My first book.

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/397101   this is the link to my first book. please go to it and leave a review for me.

The Rant that should have been sooner...

I do not try to rant on my page for people getting in my damned business about me. i just put my hubby in the hospital one more time. He has no other thing to really do with it, but have the horrible trying time of being manic and hurt. Go ahead and piss me off again. i have to teach my kid not to be pissy at "crazy" people because of the attitudes in my family alone. I never would go against them, but some of them need to grow the fuck up and know it is not all about them either and when they do wrong they should help get the wrong right. I should not have to. I love my family do not get me wrong but some of them need to really grow the fuck up and get a life worthy of bitching about. My son is my world I hurt him bad for all the hurt i was given and it made it that much worse, but I love the hell out my kid and at 15 he does tell me maybe. Won't give that one up he will be embarrassed if he hears i say he does. He is a damned good kid to me even though I did what i did and is really doing so well with the hurt i caused him and he caused me is no more for me. he means the world to me and I am tired of the stigmatization type of shit that goes with the "crazy fucking word crazy" Now i am done. Poor or not i pay my way more than others and I do the best i can why mess that up for him more when I am trying to damned his thinking of me trying to want to die before. It hurt me too. I wanted to end his hurt and pain. Did anyone ask me that. It was the whole thing I wanted to end his and my hubby hurt from me. so go suck eggs to people who cannot handle the damned truth. That was a past rant that just came flooding out. Hugs to my friends for being there too. it meant a lot

I posted this on Facebook thinking about what I said and know for a fact that this country is so screwed up sometimes in the priorities of the people it sucks. And the bad thing is the people that really do help do not get enough attention to how they help even when it is anonymous it should be said they are here. When i was down at he shelter there were some churches who had their word to get out, but they truly thought they were trying to make a difference by helping and were so much wanting to take the hurt these girls had and scrub it clean with the help of the lord and to go on and and let the past go and go on to better. Departing just a bit from the religious tone, the whole gist i got being on  the outside of it is that they were helping and they cared. Most people see homeless people as drug addicts or alcoholics or mental patients who were too sick. Not true i met some people that had kids that were having a hard time due to either a job loss or just that one person had gotten in a bad rut like i did. It is not all like it said to be. Just because a person perceives a place or a person a less than does not mean they are. There was a wonderful guy who was extremely different because he has seen war and it got him. I used to give him cigs and just a hello to make his day less hurtful. He smiled several of the times i seen him even though he was talking about the booms of bombs. Some were scared, I was not. For the life of me i do not ever think if you were in my shoes you would think the way you do now. if have been you know it already and bless your hearts you made it upwards. I did, but i left some good women down there hoping for the best.